A topologist is a person who doesn’t know the difference between a coffee cup and a doughnut.
Some say the pope is the greatest cardinal. But others insist this cannot be so, as every pope has a successor.
Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.
I’m bad at math, so the equation 2n+2n is foreign to me.
Deaf mathematicians communicate through sin language.
An English mathematician was asked by his very religious colleague: Do you believe in one God? Answer: Yes, up to isomorphism!
A British mathematician was giving a talk in Grothendieck’s seminar in Paris. He started “Let X be a variety…”. This caused some talking among the students sitting in the back, who were asking each other “What’s a variety?”. J.-P. Serre, sitting in the front row, turns around a bit annoyed and says “Integral scheme of …
Professor: What is a root of f(z) of multiplicity k? Student: It is a number a such that if you plug it into f, you get 0; if you plug it in again, you again get 0, and so k times. But if you plug it into f for the k+1-st time, you do not …
Why did the mathematician name his dog “Cauchy”? Because he left a residue at every pole.